It was the worst of times, it was the worst of times. The United States today: it’s Watergate, 9/11, the Civil War, the potato famine, and the cancellation of “Sex and the City” all rolled into one. Thank god, due to climate change, the world’s supposed to end in eight years. That reminds me. I gotta pick up my shirts at the cleaners.
So, why is everything so bad? Because we live in the age of hyperbole. In fact, some say we’re living in the greatest, most incredible era of hyperbole since the beginning of time! In which hacks use extreme rhetoric to scare you into submission.
If you don’t wear a mask outside while jogging, you have blood on your hands! If you support the cops, you’re a racist, with blood on your hands. And if you cut your finger slicing tomatoes, you have blood on your hands. (Well, that would be true.) But even more – if you disagree with Joe – you might just as well be Jefferson Davis himself.
Joe Biden, 7/13: The assault on free and fair elections is just such a threat — literally. I’ve said it before. We’re facing the most significant test of our democracy