It’s confusing to be a college student in America. And not just because you pay hundreds of thousands of dollars to make you stupid. I could do that for free with a hammer. But I kid.
It’s tough to be in college in America. Land of the free, home of the brave. And pizza with cheese-stuffed crust. Yep if you’re in college, the biggest threat is carbs. It’s one place where you can cry about inequality while turning your ass into your own portable ottoman. And if anyone’s mean to you, there’s a campus crisis center full of fluffy pillows and emotional support llamas.
Now, you could consider yourself lucky. But if you do – no one is going to agree. Clearly, America is the worst place on earth, according to their professors, who judge the whole country based off things they learned from their professors. It’s a tenured daisy chain of hate that regenerates every year, spitting another elite class of activist brats who think dying your hair purple is a brave political stance.
So as you know, protesters in Cuba have been seen flying our American flag over the past couple of days. That’s weird! Cuz it’s not the Cuban flag.